consider it a public service

A friend of mine recently got an IUD (intrauterine device), because she wanted a hormone-free, long-lasting (5-12 year), quickly reversible form of birth control.

So far, she's pleased with the procedure and she's experienced very few side effects.

In the interest of full disclosure, here are the risks.

nouvelle vague at the casbah

I fell in love with Nouvelle Vague in France last summer, when my friend Turk gave me their CD.

They're touring the U.S. and will be at the Casbah on Tuesday, Sept. 27. Tix are $15, but when I tried to buy them online, I couldn't.

The band's Web site says they're playing on Wednesday, 9/28, which is a bit disconcerting. But it also lists "Monday, 9/25" (9/25 is a Sunday) at the Hollywood Bowl, with Dead Can Dance.

life in the 'hood

7:14 p.m. Friday, while driving home from the gym: Seeing a mid-90's Thunderbird, painted in a purplish shade of magenta glittery carnie paint with huge flecks, with CA license plate "PYT 01".

9:05 p.m Friday: Hearing a very agitated Mexican woman screaming at the top of her lungs in Spanish at her son in the alley behind my condo.

9:25 p.m. Friday while going out to my car: Seeing said woman, hitting her son (who towered over her) and stood between her and his pregnant puta girlfriend, keeping his mom from going after her. Gratuitous detail: Mama had crazy-ass blonde hair, a raggedy t-shirt with the word "Budweiser" on the back, and a very foul mouth.

9:30 p.m. Friday, while driving to Harry's: Seeing a group of little girls dressed in grass skirts, plumeria headbands, and tank tops practicing hula dancing in a carport.

10:55 a.m. Saturday, while at Harry's: Seeing a woman walking down the street in her pajamas and a huge towel turban.

11:03 p.m. Sunday, while blogging: Hearing some serious gangsta rap, alternately criticizing and (presumably) praising bitches, hos, and other members of my gender.

irony is wasted on the stupid

A love of irony + a gratuitous slam at our president and Alanis Morissette = this post, courtesy of h2g2.

Irony is a much-misunderstood form of humour. It is somewhat culture-specific, being more prevalent where wordplay is common (notably in the UK, where the pun has been raised to an art form), so many people fail to 'get' irony, while others apply the term incorrectly. It is a technique beloved of satirists, and one which is hard to master (there is always the danger of slipping into overt sarcasm which is, as has been observed, the lowest form of wit).

Irony is

• The humorous (or mildly sarcastic) use of words to imply something different from, and often opposite to, their literal meaning.
• An expression marked by a deliberate contrast between apparent and intended meaning, usually to draw attention to some incongruity1 or irrationality.
• A literary style employing such contrasts for humorous or rhetorical effect.
• Incongruity between what might be expected and what actually occurs, or an occurrence or circumstance notable for such incongruity.

Some examples

• An ironic statement might be, 'I enjoy avant-garde music - chords are so passé.' Note, though, that this could equally be taken as either sarcastic or hopelessly pretentious depending on the tone in which it is delivered, and the audience. So irony lies somewhere on a line with plain old-fashioned humour at one end, and outright sarcasm at the other.
• Irony can also be unconscious. It is unlikely that George W. Bush was being intentionally ironic when he said that he would not recognise the result of the Zimbabwean presidential election, since the process had been 'flawed'.

Irony is not
Irony can be humorous, but most humour is not ironic. Some informative examples of what irony is not come, ironically, from the Alanis Morissette song 'Ironic'. Here are a few.

• An old man turned 98/He won the lottery and died the next day - Tragedy, not irony.
• It's a black fly in your chardonnay - Bummer but not ironic (although there is arguably some irony in the fly being black, however this does at least mean you don't ingest it with the drink).
• It's a death row pardon two minutes too late - Not irony, just another example of why the death penalty is fatally flawed.
• It's like rain on your wedding day - Not even close, unless you've gone from Manchester to Hawaii for your wedding and get the first rain in August for 30 years, while Manchester experiences glorious sunshine, and how likely is that?
• A traffic jam when you're already late - certainly fails the 'unexpected' criterion.
• A no-smoking sign on your cigarette break - more of a life-saver than an irony, that.
• It's like 10,000 spoons when all you need is a knife - Not unless you are in the Acme Knife Factory being approached by a mad axeman and reach behind you for a weapon, only to find that you're in the newly-opened spoon department.

Via Diana

tragically hip

Apparently, women with big hips - with fat on them - live longer.

Curvy women are more likely to live longer than their slimmer counterparts
Institute of Preventative Medicine in Copenhagen researchers found those with wider hips also appeared to be protected against heart conditions.

Women with a hip measurement smaller than 40 inches, or a size 14 would not have this protection, they said.

The researchers say hip fat contains a beneficial natural anti-inflammatory.

Via Baglady

chasing away the predators

Speech originally given on July 28, 2005
Award: Best speaker

---

I ran across a thought-provoking quote a few months ago:

Throughout history, it has been the inaction of those who could have acted; the indifference of those who should have known better; the silence of the voice of justice when it mattered most; that has made it possible for evil to triumph.
-Haile Selassie, 1892-1975, Emperor of Ethiopia

In short,

• What I do matters.
• What you do matters.
• Every single one of us has the power and the responsibility to make a difference.

I was still reflecting on these ideas when I read an amazing story on CNN's Web site.

lions saved her
Ethiopian police say that three lions rescued a 12-year-old girl kidnapped by men who wanted to force her into marriage. The lions chased off her abductors and guarded her until police and relatives tracked her down in a remote corner of Ethiopia.

The men had held the girl for seven days, repeatedly beating her, before the lions chased them away and guarded her for half a day before her family and police found her.

"They stood guard until we found her and then they just left her like a gift and went back into the forest," Sgt. Wondimu Wedajo said, adding he did not know whether the lions were male or female.

"If the lions had not come to her rescue then it could have been much worse. Often these young girls are raped and severely beaten to force them to accept the marriage," he said.

"Everyone ... thinks this is some kind of miracle, because normally the lions would attack people," Wondimu said.

Stuart Williams, a wildlife expert with the rural development ministry, said that it was likely that the young girl was saved because she was crying from the trauma of her attack.

"A young girl whimpering could be mistaken for the mewing sound from a lion cub, which in turn could explain why they (the lions) didn't eat her," "Otherwise they probably would have."

The girl, the youngest of four brothers and sisters, was "shocked and terrified" and had to be treated for the cuts from her beatings.

Police have caught four of the men, but were still looking for three others.

The United Nations estimates that more than 70 percent of marriages in Ethiopia are by abduction, practiced in rural areas where the majority of the country's 71 million people live.

the real predators
This story fascinates me, because in the end, it was the lions that chased away the real predators.

I told you this story, not so that you would judge the Ethiopian people for having a marriage custom that is so violent, but to urge you to consider whether you would subject your own daughters, sisters, or nieces to a similar fate.

But this is America, right? We don't let men kidnap girls and then marry them, do we ?

The fact is, we don't even have to look beyond our own borders to find stories of young girls who are forced into marriage. Yesterday's CNN home page included the story of a 22-year-old Nebraska man who is facing criminal charges for kidnapping a 13-year-old girl and having sex with her. The twist: she is now his legal wife at 14 years of age. But before he legally married her in Kansas, he did two other things:

1. He got her pregnant.
2. He got her family's permission to marry her.

choices
The fact is, I'm lucky to have been born in the time, place, and family that I was. We live in a country where women have an active role in the Senate, House of Representatives, and Supreme Court. Our nation's cultural, political, and social values give me choices that many women can never even dream of. And my parents' own values encouraged me to seek education and to be an independent woman before I even considered marriage or family. All of these things contribute to my worldview and my belief that forcing a young girl into marriage is completely unacceptable.

I am outraged when I read these types of stories in the media. I'm wary of imposing my values on the rest of the world and ask myself where we should draw the line, both in our own country and outside our borders. But I keep coming back to my belief that there are universal values that transcend nationalities, religion, and culture.

universal rights
The United Nations documented these universal values, immediately following the atrocities of World War II. The UN chose to pursue this monumental effort, largely at the prompting of one woman, an American named Eleanor Roosevelt.

She argued that universal human rights begin "in small places, close to home - so close and so small that they cannot be seen on any maps of the world ... Unless these rights have meaning there, they have little meaning anywhere. Without concerted citizen action to uphold them close to home, we shall look in vain for progress in the larger world."

The result is the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, a beautiful declaration of the rights of all men and women, which includes 30 articles, outlining the fundamental rights of humanity. Here are a few:

• All human beings are born free and equal in dignity and rights.
• Everyone has the right to life, liberty and security of person.
• No one shall be held in slavery or servitude.
• No one shall be subjected to torture or to cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment or punishment.
• Everyone charged with a crime is presumed innocent until proven guilty.
• Everyone has the right to freedom of thought, conscience and religion; and the right to freedom of opinion and expression
• Everyone has the right to education.
• Marriage shall be entered into only with the free and full consent of the intending spouses.
• Everyone has duties to the community in which alone the free and full development of his personality is possible.

Eleanor Roosevelt understood her duty to the community. She was the most influential member of the UN's Commission on Human Rights and unlike most of the other members, Mrs. Roosevelt was neither a scholar nor an expert on international law. She was, however, enthusiastic and principled. Above all, she had strong humanitarian convictions and a steady faith in human dignity and worth.

With characteristic modesty, Eleanor Roosevelt considered her position on the Commission to be one of ambassador for the common man and woman.

The delegates to the Commission on Human Rights elected Eleanor Roosevelt their Chairperson. The delegates recognized her unparalleled humanitarian convictions. She was widely esteemed as a person who both understood and felt the plight of the common man and woman. She had a keen sense of what the average person expected out of life - what men, women and children needed to flourish as individuals.

Eleanor Roosevelt's concern for humanity made her the driving force behind the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. She was a modest woman who passionately pursued what she imagined would become a cornerstone in the struggle for human rights and fundamental freedoms for everyone - everywhere.

She lived her life in the center the Twentieth Century's most important events: the Great Depression, World War II, the establishment of the United Nations and the adoption of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.

She confronted both opportunity and adversity with a sense of optimism and determination.

what you can do
Heed Eleanor’s example and consider what you can do to help the status of women. I've provided a list of three things you can consider that will help women in our community, in the U.S., and around the world:

1. Donate your old cell phone to the Body Shop by August 31.
2. Help end violence against American women: Sign the 700women.org petition today.
3. Help end violence against women worldwide: Sign the CEDAW petition today.

For those who are skeptical about whether signing a petition to pass yet another treaty can really have an impact, consider this:

The men who kidnapped the girl in Ethiopia were arrested and are currently awaiting trial because of the CEDAW treaty. Ethiopia is a signatory to the treaty and, as a result, recently enacted a law that that prosecutes those who use kidnapping as a means to marriage. The law went into effect on May 9, 2005 this year, the same month that the girl was abducted.

What I do matters.
What you do matters.
And every single one of us has the power and responsibility to make a difference.
Will you do your part to chase away the predators?


-------------------
Handout that accompanied the speech

Throughout history, it has been the inaction of those who could have acted; the indifference of those who should have known better; the silence of the voice of justice when it mattered most; that has made it possible for evil to triumph.
-Haile Selassie, 1892-1975, Emperor of Ethiopia

The Body Shop National Cell Phone Collection
Support the fight to stop family violence. The Body Shop National Cell Phone Collection will sell, refurbish, or recycle donated phones. The proceeds benefit the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV) and the Wireless Foundation.

Additionally, the Body Shop will donate nearly 1,500 wireless phones to domestic violence shelter partners. These wireless phones will be distributed to victims of domestic violence within our community.

Wireless phones can be dropped off at any of The Body Shop stores through August 31, 2005


The "700 Women" Campaign
Every day in the U.S., 700 women are raped or assaulted by their partners, and an average of four women are murdered by their husbands or boyfriends.

Join hundreds of thousands of women and men across the country in making sure that the Violence Against Women Act is reauthorized by Congress before it expires in September, 2005.

Urge your Congresswoman/ Congressman to renew the Violence Against Women Act.


Convention on the Elimination of All Forms of Discrimination Against Women (CEDAW)
The Convention on the Elimination of All Forms of Discrimination Against Women (CEDAW) establishes a minimum set of standards for combating discrimination against women.

The treaty has been ratified by over 169 countries. The United States is one of the very few countries in the world that has not yet ratified it, making it easier for repressive governments to easily discount the treaty's provisions.

Urge your Senators to pass this important treaty.

seeking comfort with a vengeance

Here's my astro-profile (Taurus), according to swoon.com.

Stubbornness and stability are double-edged swords, since clinging to the familiar cuts both ways. Your devotion to the notion of classic love makes you among the most romantic members of the zodiac. Your tastes run toward meaningful, erotic relationships as opposed to fast, filthy fixes. Your marathon practicality pervades professional and personal realms, as you doggedly nurture goals to their conclusions. Your process is to prepare plans and proceed methodically from start to finish. You're anything but a quitter. The downside is that you're disinclined to cut your losses. Clearly, you'd rather fight than switch. The problems that stem from your need to control your environment, yourself and others are the price you're willing to pay to drive your destiny. You seek comfort with a vengeance in your work ethic, possessions, financial security and efficiency. Sometimes you unduly sacrifice pleasure for business. But your sense of humor, generosity and sincerity can be illuminated by the sunshine of someone who accepts you as you are and is willing to play conformer to your reformer.

a personal milestone

Two years ago today, I got the worst news of my life.

In short, a specialist told me that I had kidney cancer, but that it hadn't breached Gerota's fascia or invaded my lymph nodes yet. My mind reeling, I asked him for a brochure or pamphlet on my condition. He told me that I struck him as pretty intelligent and then offered me a urology textbook to read for more information on renal cell carcinoma. Welcome to my HMO.

I was lucky. My diagnosis was T1N0M0, which means that I was stage 1: My tumor was about 2.3 cm by 4 cm, with no metastasis and no lymph node involvement. I was also informed that the 5-year survival rate for people with clear cell carcinoma and my staging ranges from 60-98%.

Anyhow, as I said to Harry last night, I've changed my life in so many ways since then. My life today is completely different than it was on July 29, 2003. And no amount of money would be enough to go back to the way things were then.
CT scan and cell cytology images via emedicine.com and pathguy.com

fare thee well

Today is a dark day.

That's because Jeff Wilson, the smartest (and the coolest) guy in Development, is leaving us to go get a Ph.D. in renaissance british literature and critical theory at UC Irvine.

Honestly, the nerve of some people.

Seriously, I wish him the best of luck as he tackles Milton and Shakespeare. And with making ends meet in Stepford the OC on a Chancellor's Fellowship.

say g-wot?

I was reading Slate today and learned that instead of fighting a "Global War On Terror," we're now waging the "Global Struggle Against Violent Extremism."

The Bush administration is retooling its slogan for the fight against Al Qaeda and other terrorist groups, pushing the idea that the long-term struggle is as much an ideological battle as a military mission, senior administration and military officials said Monday.

Terror attacks, Taliban resurgence, suicide bombs—obviously, it's time to change the slogan.
Three subquestions arise just from the lead. First, this is the administration's solution to the spike in terrorist incidents, the Taliban's resurgence in Afghanistan, and the politico-military deterioration in Iraq—to retool the slogan?

Second, the White House and the Pentagon are just now coming around to the idea that the struggle is as much ideological as military? This wasn't obvious, say, three or four years ago?

Apparently not. Eric Schmitt and Thom Shanker, the Times reporters who co-authored the article, note:

Administration and Pentagon officials say the revamped campaign has grown out of meetings of President Bush's senior national security advisers that began in January, and it reflects the evolution in Mr. Bush's own thinking nearly four years after the Sept. 11 attacks. [Italics added.]

It took four years for the president of the United States to realize that fighting terrorism has a political component? It took six months for his senior advisers to retool a slogan? We are witnessing that rare occasion when the phrase "I don't know whether to laugh or cry" can be uttered without lapsing into cliché.

But the shallowness gets deeper still. The Times story doesn't notice what appears to be the driving force behind the new slogan—a desire for a happier acronym.

turd blossom, part deux

A glossary of all the president's nicknames for politicos.

Slate's contest to pick a Dubya nickname for John Roberts.
Via Rick

hey turd blossom!

(Yesterday's Doonesbury: click image for larger version)


(Today's Doonesbury: click image for larger version)

As one of my friends put it, it's interesting that "overseas, they get to read about this in the mainstream media and we can't even read it in a comic strip ..."

Newspapers pull 'Doonesbury' over Rove moniker
It may be President Bush's nickname for key political adviser Karl Rove, but some editors don't think it belongs in their newspapers.

About a dozen papers objected to Tuesday's and Wednesday's "Doonesbury" comic strips, and some either pulled or edited them.

The strips refer to Rove, the White House deputy chief of staff, as "Turd Blossom."

The term is said to be one of several nicknames Bush uses for Rove, one of his closest allies and who is widely credited for Bush's election in 2000 and re-election in 2004. The mainstream U.S. media have rarely mentioned the nickname, but it has gained traction in the international press and on the Internet.
Via Allison, CNN, and the Doonesbury archive.

dooced again

Sandra just sent me a note on a prominent blogger who got dooced.

As it turns out, there are beauty editor openings at both Ladies Home Journal and Seventeen this morning. Nadine Habosh, until late an associate beauty editor at LHJ and the notorious blogger Jolie in NYC, gave notice at her job just before being fired when her blogging identity was discovered. (She had used her blog to talk out of school about her fellow editors.) For that reason, Seventeen--where Habosh was headed--rescinded its offer to her.

Via mediabistro.com

confessions of the cluelessly aloof

Brax's confession spawned this post ... but I probably wouldn't have even noticed.

Every now and then I will check out a girl I'm not attracted to. I do it because I remember what it felt like to think that no one would want to look at me. I hope it makes them appreciate themselves.

While waiting for our movie to begin on Sunday, Harry told me that a guy checked me out on the way into the theatre. I had missed it completely. My cluelessness is genuine — I'm wretchedly oblivious to the fact that someone might be taking an interest in me.

Corollary: I've been told that I'm very aloof in clubs, and that I have crappy eye contact in the same situations. In short, I give the object of my attention very little with which to work.

my shoulder, my psyche

Call it psychic dandruff.

I ran into someone yesterday who was the source of much drama and angst a few years ago. She was very complimentary and uncharacteristically pleasant.

I made small talk and came away from the encounter honestly amused that she's keeping up on my life (unprompted, she told me about my condo). I'll also admit to enjoying her visible surprise when I left the table to go on a date with someone else whom she knows.

What's that quote? "Living well is the best revenge." It seems that the universe has sorted things out nicely for both of us. And it's a lovely feeling to brush her off my shoulder like so much debris from my past.

félicitations, lance

Armstrong wins last Tour
‘Vive le Tour, forever,’ emotional U.S. cyclist as he retires on top
PARIS - One last time, “The Star-Spangled Banner” rang out over the Champs-Elysees in honor of Lance Armstrong.

One last time, on the podium against the backdrop of the Arc de Triomphe, the cancer survivor who became the greatest cyclist in Tour de France history slipped into the leader’s yellow jersey Sunday. This time, it was the winner’s jersey, for an unprecedented seventh consecutive year in the world’s most grueling race.

Lance Armstrong holds the winner's trophy after winning his seventh straight Tour de France on Sunday. Armstrong credited Tiger Woods, Wayne Gretzky, Michael Jordan and Andre Agassi as personal inspirations.

Final Standings
1. Lance Armstrong U.S. 86:15:02
2. Ivan Basso Italy +4:40
3. Jan Ullrich Germany +6:21
4. Francisco Mancebo Spain +9:59
5. Alexandre Vinokourov Kazakhstan +11.01

je pédale dans la choucroute

I love food. I love the French language. And I especially love idioms. Here's a posting that combines all three passions ...

My friend Diana posted a great LA Times article about French food idioms, which I'm shamelessly lifting and posting here. I knew appuie sur le champignon, but most of the others are new to me, hence the title of this posting.

Oh, and the tagline for my blog, j'ai du pain sur la planche, should also be explained here, as it is a food-related idiom that literally means "I have bread on the board," but really means "I have a lot on my plate."

Given how serious the French are about food, using food as metaphors for life makes perfect sense. Their love for food is equal only to their love for slang, and French slang, to an amazing degree, is food related. In short, the French obsession with food is embedded in the language.

Here are the straightforward ones:
Good like good bread (Bon comme du bon pain)
Skinny as a string bean (maigre comme un haricot)
Make some dough (faire du blé): Earn some money




Look at that quarter-wheel of Brie (Regardez ce quart de Brie): Look at that person's huge nose.

Some serious sorrel (de l'oseille): Plenty of money.

I could eat a parish priest rubbed with garlic (Je pourrais manger un curé frotté d'ail): I could eat a horse.

Oh, mashed potatoes! (Oh purée!): Darn it!

I can eat my soup on your head (Je peux manger ma soupe sur ta tête): I'm a head taller than you.

Zucchini (courgette): Head.

Coffeepot (cafetière): Head.

She's working from her coffeepot (Elle travaille de la cafetière): She's a bit out of it.

Worry about your own onions (Occupe-toi de tes oignons): Mind your own business.

Onions (oignons): Buttocks.

Make fried marlin eyes (Faire des yeux de merlans frits): Make goo-goo eyes.

Your rear end is surrounded by noodles (Tu as le cul bordé de nouilles): You're extremely lucky.

Go ahead, tall unhooker of sausages! (Va donc, grand dépendeur d'andouilles!): Go ahead, you big lug! (The guy who unhooks the andouilles from the ceiling must be very tall and not very smart.)

You're turning my blood into blood sausage (Tu me fais tourner le sang en boudin): You're worrying me.

To have two eggs on the plate (avoir deux oeufs sur le plat): To be flat-chested.

She has the banana (Elle a la banane): She's got a big smile.

That puts the butter in the spinach (Ça met du beurre dans les épinards): That's icing on the cake.

You want the butter and the money of the butter (Tu veux le beurre et l'argent du beurre): You can't have your cake and eat it too.

He's sugaring his strawberries (Il sucre les fraises): He's old and senile, one foot in the grave.

Fall in the apples (tomber dans les pommes): To faint.

To be a cooking oil (être une huile): To be high-ranked, a big cheese.

Land a peach (mettre une pêche): Punch someone in the face.

Ears like cauliflowers (des oreilles en chou-fleur): Big ears.

Make some salads (faire des salades): Tell tales out of school.

A veal (un veau): A sluggish car.

Push on the mushroom (Appuie sur le champignon): Step on the gas.

Make a total cheese (en faire tout un fromage): Make a big deal out of something.

She pedals in the sauerkraut (Elle pédale dans la choucroute): She doesn't understand diddly squat.

A noodle (une nouille): An idiot.

Right in the pear (en pleine poire): Right in the face.

Make the leek (faire le poireau/poireauter): Wait impatiently for someone.

Send the sauce (envoyez la sauce): Make an effort.

He has some brioche (Il a de la brioche): He has a potbelly.

She has the heart of an artichoke, she has an artichoke heart (Elle a le coeur d'artichaut): She's sentimental.

A big asparagus (grande asperge): A tall person.

Spitting in the soup (cracher dans la soupe): Being overly critical or ungrateful.

Send a chestnut (envoyer un marron): Punch someone in the face.

That's turning to vinegar (Ça tourne au vinaigre): The situation's out of hand/going badly.

He's not in his plate (Il n'est pas dans son assiette): He's not himself.

The carrots are cooked (Les carottes sont cuites): It's too late to do anything about it.

The end of the string beans (la fin des haricots): The biggest deal possible, in a catastrophic way.

aamuleipä

I learned a new word recently: aamuleipä.

It also happens to be the name of a fun blog I discovered a few weeks back.

march of the penguins

Although the title conjures visions of Hoth and the Imperial Storm Trooper music, I can't wait to see March of the Penguins.

penguin lust lives

I grew up reading Bloom County and always loved Opus and the penguin lust storyline. Imagine my joy at discovering that there's some real penguin lust afoot. Zurita is a homewrecking penguin. Her tale includes catfights, seduction, and reaping the wild wind.

The sordid tale of a desperate penguin: This widow stole her neighbors' husbands, fell into the flippers of a younger male, and now is winging it as a single mom.

First she thoroughly breached all sense of propriety among her penguin peers by stealing spouses, brawling with another female and seducing an uninitiated adolescent male.

Now, separated from the rest of the Brookfield Zoo colony, Zurita has likely become the world's first successful single-parent penguin, raising a chick fathered by a much younger companion who can't be bothered to help out ...

Zurita began looking for love in the wrong places, by soliciting males already spoken for.

When she approached a male named Popero, his mate, Bumblebee, confronted Zurita in a violent tussle.

Penguins have sharp beaks and a strong bite, and the two females went after each other's faces, trying to cut each other and pounding away with their powerful wing flippers ...

"Penguins are very social animals, so we couldn't leave Zurita alone," McGill said. Instead, they brought in a year-old male, Gazpacho, to keep her company ...

As she began incubation, she at times left the eggs, Broniewicz said, as though inviting Gazpacho to take a turn sitting on them. Whenever she stood up, however, he expressed interest only in making whoopee.

"He liked the first part of making babies but was far less interested in the second part of tending to the eggs and the hatched chicks," McGill said.

Zurita ended up sitting on the eggs for the entire 42-day incubation, fed by the keepers and rising only momentarily to stretch and get a drink of water.

Keepers knew Zurita could not physically care for two hatched chicks alone, raising the specter that neither would survive. So they removed the second egg.

Sure enough, when the remaining egg hatched, Gazpacho again ignored his duty.

"He is the youngest male on record in any zoo anywhere to have successfully fertilized an egg," Broniewicz said, "but he is just too immature to take up real parenting duties.

"He had free access to Zurita and the chick, but most of the time he wanted to be off playing with his friends, the other juveniles in the colony," stopping off at the nest only to see if Zurita was in a mating mood.

Via Gnostical Turpitude

harry potter is a capitalist pig

Given the way the latest Harry Potter book is flying off the shelves, I thought it time to resurrect this amusing op-ed piece that first appeared in Le Monde last summer. It's worth noting that the article is by French theorist Ilias Yocaris.

Harry Potter is a capitalist pig
PARIS, Saturday, July 24, 2004 - The success of the Harry Potter series has provoked a lively discussion among French literary theorists about the novels' underlying message and the structure of Harry's school, Poudlard (Hogwarts). This article, which appeared last month in the French daily Le Monde, got particular attention, including an essay published in response arguing that Harry is an antiglobalist crusader.

With the Harry Potter series, J.K. Rowling has enchanted the world: the reader is drawn into a magical universe of flying cars, spells that make its victims spew slugs, trees that give blows, books that bite, elf servants and portraits that argue.

On the face of it, the world of Harry Potter has nothing in common with our own. Nothing at all, except one detail: like ours, the fantastic universe of Harry Potter is a capitalist universe.

Hogwarts is a private sorcery school, and its director constantly has to battle against the state as represented, essentially, by the inept minister of magic, Cornelius Fudge, the ridiculous bureaucrat Percy Weasley, and the odious inspector Dolores Umbridge.

The apprentice sorcerers are also consumers who dream of acquiring all sorts of high-tech magical objects, including high-performance wands or the latest brand-name flying brooms, manufactured by multinational corporations.

Hogwarts, then, is not only a school, but also a market: subject to an incessant advertising onslaught, the students are never as happy as when they can spend their money in the boutiques near the school. There is all sorts of bartering between students, and the author heavily emphasizes the possibility of social success for young people who enrich themselves thanks to trade in magical products.

The tableau is completed by the ritual complaints about the rigidity and incompetence of bureaucrats. Their mediocrity is starkly contrasted with the inventiveness and audacity of some entrepreneurs, whom Rowling never ceases to praise. For example, Bill Weasley, who works for the goblin bank Gringotts, is presented as the opposite of his brother, Percy the bureaucrat. The first is young, dynamic and creative, and wears clothes that "would not have looked out of place at a rock concert"; the second is unintelligent, obtuse, limited and devoted to state regulation, his career's masterpiece being a report on the standards for the thicknesses of cauldrons.

We have, then, an invasion of neoliberal stereotypes in a fairy tale. The fictional universe of Harry Potter offers a caricature of the excesses of the Anglo-Saxon social model: under a veneer of regimentation and traditional rituals, Hogwarts is a pitiless jungle where competition, violence and the cult of winning run riot.

The psychological conditioning of the apprentice sorcerers is clearly based on a culture of confrontation: competition among students to be prefect; competition among Hogwarts "houses" to gain points; competition among sorcery schools to win the Triwizard tournament; and, ultimately, the bloody competition between the forces of Good and Evil.

This permanent state of war ends up redefining the role of institutions: faced with ever-more violent conflicts, they are no longer able to protect individuals against the menaces that they face everywhere. The Minister of Magic fails pitifully in his combat against Evil, and the regulatory constraints of school life hinder Harry and his friends in defending themselves against the attacks and provocations that they constantly encounter. The apprentice sorcerers are thus alone in their struggle to survive in a hostile milieu, and the weaker, like Harry's schoolmate Cedric Diggory, are inexorably eliminated.

These circumstances influence the education given the young students of Hogwarts. The only disciplines that matter are those that can give students an immediately exploitable practical knowledge that can help them in their battle to survive.

That's not astonishing, considering how this prestigious school aims to form, above all, graduates who can compete in the job market and fight against Evil. Artistic subjects are thus absent from Hogwarts's curriculum, and the teaching of social sciences is considered of little value: the students have only some tedious courses of history. It's very revealing that Harry finds them "as boring as Percy's cauldron-bottom report." In other words, in the cultural universe of Harry Potter, social sciences are as useless and obsolete as state regulation.

Harry Potter, probably unintentionally, thus appears as a summary of the social and educational aims of neoliberal capitalism. Like Orwellian totalitarianism, this capitalism tries to fashion not only the real world, but also the imaginations of consumer-citizens.

The underlying message to young fans is this: You can imagine as many fictional worlds, parallel universes or educational systems as you want, but they will still all be regulated by the laws of the market. Given the success of the Harry Potter series, several generations of young people will be indelibly marked by this lesson.

Ilias Yocaris is a professor of literary theory and French literature at the University Institute of Teacher Training in Nice. This article was translated from the French.

giant teapot cult

This headline made me do a double-take today: Malaysia arrests dozens who follow cult built around giant teapot.

Malaysian authorities on Wednesday arrested 58 followers of a bizarre cult built around a giant teapot, two days after the sect’s headquarters was torched.

The official Bernama news agency said those arrested were aged between 20 and 60 years and included a New Zealand woman.

Cult leader, Ayah Pin, was not among those arrested and was believed to have gone into hiding after about 30-35 assailants armed with machetes and Molotov cocktails attacked the commune on Monday, torching a car and the roof of a building and scorching the giant teapot itself.

Police have detained a 65-year-old man over the attack.

The sect, which believes the teapot has healing properties, is in Malaysia’s northeast, a devoutly Muslim area that has suddenly lost patience with the cult, headed by the man who says he is God and owner of everything, his "Sky Kingdom."

State religious authorities have outlawed the teapot sect as a deviant cult.

Islam is the state religion in this Muslim-majority country. Malaysia also tolerates followers of other major religions, including Christianity, Hinduism and Buddhism.

why i'll never live in phoenix

Blistering heat wave kills 12 18 in Phoenix: Donations of ice, water bottles requested for those lacking air conditioning.

A blistering heat wave is being blamed for the deaths of 1218 people in Phoenix, prompting officials to ask for donations of ice and water bottles for those sweltering without air conditioning.

From Saturday to Tuesday, Phoenix police reported a dozen people had died of apparent heat-related illnesses. Ten were homeless; the other two were elderly women, including one whose home cooling system wasn’t on.

the voynich manuscript

In 1912, the antiquarian book dealer Wilfrid M. Voynich bought a number of medieval manuscripts from an undisclosed location in Europe. Among these was an illustrated manuscript codex of 234 pages, written in an unknown script.

Voynich took the manuscript to the United States and started a campaign to have it deciphered. Now, almost 100 years later, the Voynich manuscript still stands as probably the most elusive puzzle in the world of cryptography. Not a single word of this 'Most Mysterious Manuscript', written probably in the second half of the 15th Century, can be understood.
Via Harry

zealots and kamikazes

"The purpose of a suicide attack is not so much to die as it is to kill."
-Robert Pape, author of Dying to Win: The Strategic Logic of Suicide Terrorism

There was a great story on NPR this morning about the origins of suicide terrorism as a way to send a message to an occupying power:

• In the first century C.E., Jewish Zealots and Sicarii would target a Roman soldier in a square and slit his throat, knowing that his fellow soldiers would immediately kill the assassin.
• In the eleventh and twelfth century, the Ismaili would assassinate a sultan and leave a note stating "there will be further attacks unless you leave our community alone."
• During World War II, the Japanese realized that the island-hopping Americans were rapidly closing in on them in October 1944. Their response was to use kamikaze pilots to send a message. By not saving enough fuel to return to base, the kamikaze increased the number of ships damaged or sunk by four and five-fold.

While experimenting with suicide bombing in the 1980s, Hezbolah (in their fourth foray into the technique) brought down the Marine barracks in Beirut, killing 241 Marines. That led then-President Reagan to withdraw all American forces from Lebanon, and to virtually abandon the country politically and economically. That success is still cited by Hamas and Al Qaeda as the prime example of why suicide bombing is the weapon of choice in their war against the West.

quotable

"I can’t say enough good things about it [France]. I genuinely love this country, the culture, the history. I don’t know what else I can do ... of course, four or five people a day seem to know it all and have a lot of nasty things to say. But ultimately, I think we have a fine relationship."
-Lance Armstrong, 1971- , American cyclist and cancer survivor

letter from london

Turk's European odyssey continues.

Returning to Paris this afternoon after a fantastic weekend in London.

Jean has been (as usual) the perfect hostess, with a rich itinerary and tireless energy. From the time I arrived Saturday morning until we finally crashed last night, it has been a non-stop London culture class. We started with a travel card so I could jump on any bus, tube or train and go anywhere anytime, then went to the Borough Market, which is a huge open-air gourmet food festival held every Saturday. We had enough free samples of everything to satisfy our lunch needs, then dessert and coffee before hitting the Bok Bar, a South African sports hangout for a televised rugby match and a pint. Walking along the Thames, we came to the newly created Memorial Park for the victims of the 07/07 bombings. It was very silent and sad with enormous blankets of flowers sent to "The People of London and the Families of the Victims" from "The Republic of Jamaica", or "The Consulate of Bangladesh", etc... Everywhere we go in the tube or on the train, we see an incredible police presence.

After dinner at an Indian restaurant we went to a party for a girl leaving for Oz and the entire party (25 or so) went out to a club til whenever it was we left.

Sunday we bused and tubed to Hampstead Heath, a several hundred acres estate of mostly dense woods with several open heaths (meadows) and ponds. The manor of the estate is the Kenwood house, which appeared after a walk of a few kilometres. It has an amazing collection of art; Vermeer, Hals, Rembrandt, Turner, Constable, Reynolds, Gainsborough and is freeee! We picnikked on the grounds before walking back to browse the Camden Town Market, which is a crush of people from all over the world selling (and selling hard) everything from clothing, food and jewelry, to things they can only whisper about. Indian food for dinner (again) before going out for Quiz Night at the pub. Tea and Crumpets for brekkie, now I'm off to the National Academy for an Impressionist exhibit before I catch the Eurostar to Paris Gare Nord.

All my best, and I'll be back to the colonies in a week.

quotable

"Love isn't something you feel, it's something you do. And if the person you're with doesn't want it, do yourself a favor and save it for someone that does."
-Nate Fisher's character on Six Feet Under Episode 57: "The Rainbow of Her Reasons," written by Jill Soloway.

maxfield parrish at sdmart

Marta mentioned that she wants to see Maxfield Parrish, Master of Make-Believe at SD Museum of Art. Wanna join us?

This summer, museum visitors will be treated to more than 80 works of superlative design and beauty by one of America's favorite artists, Maxfield Parrish (1870-1966). The nationally touring exhibition titled Maxfield Parrish, Master of Make-Believe, presents many of the master illustrator's most recognizable art works, including his popular calendar and book illustrations, his signature classicized paintings, and the mural he painted for the Long Island studio of Gertrude Vanderbilt Whitney. Exhibition Ticketing Lecture Series

rove must go

Fact: Karl Rove leaked the name of an undercover CIA agent (Valerie Plame) to the press. Not only is this a felony, but it was done as an act of revenge against a critic of Bush's war in Iraq.

Former Ambassador Joseph Wilson called on President Bush on Thursday to fire deputy chief of staff Karl Rove, saying Bush’s top-level aide engaged in an “abuse of power” by discussing Wilson’s wife’s job with a reporter.

Wilson decried what he called a White House “stonewall” in the wake of revelations that Rove, a longtime Bush confidant, was involved in the leak to the news media that Wilson’s wife, Valerie Plame, was a CIA officer.

Bush said Wednesday that he would not comment on discussions that blew her cover because it is the subject of an ongoing investigation by special counsel Patrick Fitzgerald. White House press secretary Scott McClellan said, however, the president still has confidence in Rove.

Via Diana