right down the street from the inferiority complex...

I love engrish.com.
Via Jen M.

french idioms rock

Il était à genous devant elle.
He worshipped her.
(Literally: He was on his knees before her.)

tools for blog addicts

Obsessively search for other blogs that link to yours at Technorati.
Publish your blog in book form, at Blogbinders.
Pour over your site stats at Sitemeter.
Buy yourself a self-promotional T-shirt
Via PlanetDan

we don't need no ... royalties

I was helping Diana and Ophira pack on Friday when a curious news blurb flashed on the CNN ticker.

Apparently, the kids who sang on Pink Floyd’s Another Brick in the Wall (it's Part II, right ?) are suing for overdue royalties.

We don’t need no education,
We don’t need no thought control,
No dark sarcasm in the classroom,
Hey! Teachers! Leave them kids alone!

The pupils from the 1979 fourth form music class at Islington Green School secretly recorded vocals after their teacher was approached by the band’s management. Now the 23 ex-pupils are suing for overdue session musician royalties, taking advantage of the Copyright Act 1997 to claim a percentage of the money from broadcasts.

Via DDTB

quotable

"You must be the change you wish to see."
Mahatma Gandhi, 1869 - 1948, statesman and advocate for non-violent resistance

earthly desires

You are by no means obligated to get me anything for ChristmaHanuKwanzIce.

The best gift you can give me is volunteering at a charity or non-profit organization. If you're short on time, please donate to the American Cancer Society or Kidney Cancer Association.

And if you really feel compelled to give me something and are at a loss for the perfect gift, here is some guidance:

1. Frankly, your best bet is cash, as I'm saving for a lovely vacation in 2005.
2. If that doesn't strike your fancy, consider an item on my Amazon wishlist.

giving thanks

I spent Thanksgiving with the Schubert-Sturak clans. Jennifer and Craig (and their respective families) put on a great spread at Chez Sturak. We ate all the usual foods, and I'm hoping to get Craig's mom's cranberry sauce recipe, as it was fab. The hearts game and Ali's tasty desserts courtesy of Starbucks (who knew?) were also great.

Kudos to Jennifer (and Craig) for delivering a wonderful meal and memorable holiday with grace and aplomb.

don't show this to your 2-year old

Via Georgia

national do not call list for cell phones

The national cell phone directory is about to be published and telemarketers will have access to your cell phone number. This will be even more annoying than the calls to your "regular" phone because in addition to being a disruption, these calls will also use your cellular minutes.

If you wish to avoid this, register your cell number on the National Do Not Call list, (888) 382-1222 as soon as possible. Telemarketers must comply within 3 months of your request. Complaints can be filed at this # or on the Do Not Call Web site as well.
Via Harrison

the best of daily oliver

My ex-father-in-law used to joke that he wanted to be reincarnated as a cat in a Jewish household. I'd settle for being Oliver or Hugo, living it up in the South of France.

Here are some of my faves:
http://www.textism.com/oliver/daily/2004/10/15/
http://www.textism.com/oliver/daily/2004/06/05/
http://www.textism.com/oliver/daily/2004/06/03/
http://www.textism.com/oliver/daily/2004/05/20/
http://www.textism.com/oliver/daily/2004/03/03/
http://www.textism.com/oliver/daily/2004/02/02/

Telling the dogs apart:
http://www.textism.com/photos/?s=48

And the pièce de résistance:
http://www.textism.com/oliver/daily/2003/11/02/

vioxx killed more people than 9-11

My colleague Sandra told me something alarming last week: Vioxx killed more people than 9-11.

I finally got a chance to read up on the topic and am shocked. Can we trust the FDA?

At a Senate Finance Committee on Nov. 18, government drug reviewer Dr. David Graham said FDA's handling of Merck & Co Inc.'s withdrawn painkiller Vioxx, is a 'profound regulatory failure' by an agency 'incapable of protecting America' from another dangerous drug... Graham told the committee that research indicated that Vioxx caused up to 160,000 heart attacks and strokes. It was responsible for an additional 27,785 deaths from heart ailments from 1999 to 2003, he concluded.

girls, inc.

Girls Inc. is a nonprofit organization that inspires all girls to be strong, smart, and bold. With local roots dating to 1864 and national status since 1945, Girls Inc. has responded to the changing needs of girls through research-based programs and public education efforts that empower girls to understand, value, and assert their rights:

• Girls have the right to be themselves and to resist gender stereotypes.
• Girls have the right to express themselves with originality and enthusiasm.
• Girls have the right to prepare for interesting work and economic independence.
• Girls have the right to have confidence in themselves and to be safe in the world.
• Girls have the right to accept and appreciate their bodies.
• Girls have the right to take risks, to strive freely, and to take pride in success.

quotable

"Attend to the present to deal with the past."
Lao Zu, Tao Te Ching

john ashcroft sings!

Before the soon-to-be-ex-Attorney General got busy with the Patriot Act and banning gay marriage, he was a hit singer peddling Truth.
Via PlanetDan

no shit

This NPR story slayed me.

Apparently, the WTO (World Toilet Organization) is having its 2004 summit in Beijing, in preparation for the 2008 Olympics and (Western) potty shortage.

The affluent are discussing the effluent... and the impact of toilets on tourism. One 5-star restroom included personal TVs in each stall. That's a big change, because finding a public toilet in China used to be a matter of following your nose.

But I think these folks may have taken it too far:

Photos of showcase lavatories were also displayed at the conference, from a ladybug-shaped one in a public garden to another modeled after a grass hut in a wildlife park. Facilities with baby-changing stations, wheelchair ramps and gleaming white ceramic urinals were also featured.

"New public toilets are an important symbol to demonstrate the development of the city," said Liang Guangsheng, deputy director of Beijing's Municipal Administrative Committee.

Delegates also debated the pros and cons of squat toilets versus the sit-down toilet, including this frightful fact -- When you flush a toilet that has fecal matter in it, it sends bacteria several meters in the air.

jeff bridges at MOPA through March 13, 2005

Jeff Bridges, Julianne Moore, "The Big Lebowski," 1998, silver gelatin print

Jeff Bridges - Pictures
November 18, 2004 - March 13, 2005

This exhibition represents 30 years of photographic practice by one of Hollywood's most compelling actors, Jeff Bridges. These are not traditional Hollywood glamour shots, but images of people at work. They act as Bridges' personal and professional diary, with actors, directors, and crew appearing as equal participants in the task of making movies, including "The Last Picture Show," "The Big Lebowski," "Seabiscuit," and many more.

Anyone wanna join me for this on free second Tuesday next month?

tax dollars in vs. tax dollars out

Guess which states pay the most federal tax dollars compared to which states receive the most federal tax dollars?

The Tax Foundation has released a fascinating report showing which states benefit from federal tax and spending policies, and which states foot the bill.

The report shows that of the 32 states (and the District of Columbia) that are "winners" -- receiving more in federal spending than they pay in federal taxes -- 76% are Red States that voted for George Bush in 2000. Indeed, 17 of the 20 (85%) states receiving the most federal spending per dollar of federal taxes paid are Red States.

Via PlanetDan

quench your thirst and wash away your sins!

I really hope these folks are kidding.

You may not be religious, and you may not even believe in heaven or hell, but if you have the choice between two quality spring waters, one that has been blessed, and one that has not been, then why in heaven’s name would you even take the chance? Our spring water tastes great, costs about the same price as other brands, and is blessed by religious leaders as it is being bottled.

For thousands of years, in virtually every religion, water has been used to wash away the sins of Jews, Christians, Muslims, Buddhists, and even members of the Occult. Now you can cleanse and protect yourself while extinguishing your thirst with with Holy Spring Water™.

Holy Spring Water™ is 100% pure natural Spring Water, that tastes great and has been blessed. By a Monk, a Catholic Priest, or a Holy Shaman, the blessing does not take away from the taste. Holy Spring Water™ washes away the sins of anyone feeling “less then saintly” while quenching your thirsts…like nothing else can. Try our Holy Spring Water™, Your immediate redemption and satisfaction is guaranteed.

quotable

"Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of someone else."
Judy Garland, 1922-1969, American singer and actress

'sexiest man alive'

November 29, 2004 issue

Please sit down.

I say that because I actually have friends who don't think Jude Law is attractive. Intelligent people can disagree, but I feel more than a bit vindicated. Mind you, this is the first time I've used People magazine as the justification for, well, anything. But everyone knows that the hard-hitting journalists at People are the experts when it comes to beautiful people.

Jude Law, star of “Alfie” and “I (Heart) Huckabees,” has been named this year’s “Sexiest Man Alive” by People magazine.

“What’s he all about? Supernatural good looks, supersize talent — and so nice, he might just kiss you if you have the nerve to ask,” People says in its latest issue...

She took the words right out of my mouth:

Naomi Watts, who starred with Law in “I (Heart) Huckabees,” describes the 31-year-old actor as “the most beautiful man who ever walked the Earth.”

Law, divorced from Sadie Frost and now dating his “Alfie” co-star Sienna Miller, told The Associated Press recently that despite his sex symbol status, he’s no Lothario.

“I grew up, I suppose, always looking for commitment and looking for a relationship, and that’s why I got married so young. ... And I’m in another relationship now,” he said. “So that just seems to be my pattern.”

Lest you question my reading habits, I found this on a reputable news site. And I'm not some freakish, obsessed fan. I'm just a single woman smitten with one incredibly handsome man.

subconsciousness

My new friend Denisse mentioned some things women do at work that can undermine their success, including:
1. Women tend to try and be everyone's friend at work.
2. Women tend to touch their hair when nervous. A lot.

... which made stop and fret about my own habits. (And touch my hair once.) Then she told me about this book: Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office: 101 Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers

Speaking of subconscious habits... I was in a meeting today where someone used the word "um" 52 times ( I didn't count the other filler words, but noticed a bunch) in a presentation.

I suspect that I still use lots of "ums" and other filler words when I make presentations, but listening to her verbal static today has re-kindled my motivation to attend Toastmasters regularly. Feel free to join me -- the meeting is every Thursday morning from 7 - 8:30 a.m. at Acapulco restaurant on San Juan Dr. in Old Town.

jude law is a very lovely boy

Paramount Pictures	Paramount Pictures
Renee, Dan, Miguel, and I saw "Alfie" on Sunday. At the end of the movie, Miguel commented that the movie was great, but that it didn't really need the last two sentences in the monologue at the end. I didn't have much to say, which makes sense, given that I was engrossed in Jude's sexpot character, taking in the visuals, and the sound of his smashing accent (and not actually focusing on the words coming out of his mouth). I guess that's reason enough to see it again. And this time, I promise to not look at Jude like a piece of flesh with a British accent. Seriously.
Paramount Pictures	Paramount Pictures

apparently, I rock

As all of you loyal readers already know, I just started a new job.

It's always nice to get feedback on your work, but especially nice to get it when you're new. Here is an e-mail I received today. Names have been removed to protect the innocent.

Happy:

I've incorporated your suggestions and cleaned up the draft you returned. I hope I've answered your question regarding policies. I'd like to discuss further when you have time or after ____ has reviewed. Thanks so much for your great input. You rock already----and it's only been 1 week!

queer eye for the single girl

The challenge -- Helping Happy get new clothes for work that are:

Professional looking. (She's part of the management team.)

Flattering. (She's rarely sure about what looks good on her body.)

Stylish. (She's single.)

Reasonably priced. (She didn't get THAT big a raise.)

The team -- Three fashionistas, one very interested commentator, and several amused sales clerks/ spectators:

Harrison: Style diva and girl voice #1

Nolan: Décolletage expert, argyle afficionado, and modern-dance wonder

Reggie: Smashingly fabulous price point guru

Diana: The voice of reason and girl voice #2

The results -- Ninety eight minutes, four stores, and $368 later:

Four good-fitting pairs of pants

Two just-below-the-knee skirts

Twelve fitted work shirts and sweaters

Two way-too-tight-and-low-cut-to-wear-to-work shirts

One very fun pair of underwear

Thirteen pointed messages about Happy needing to get some boots already

After their experience with Happy they have decided to turn pro and are available for hire as What a difference a gay makes!

Epilogue -- Our heroine decided to shop for a few still-needed items on her own today. Will the panel love them or send her back to style school?

interesting correlations

• IQ and 2004 voting (by state)


• SAT scores/ bachelor's degree data and 2000 voting (by state)

a bit ticked off here in California

Dear President Bush:

Congratulations on your victory over all us non-evangelicals. Actually, we're a bit ticked off here in California, so we're leaving you. California will now be its own country. And we're taking all the Blue States with us. In case you are not aware, that includes Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois, all of the North East States, and the urban half of Ohio.

We spoke to God, and she agrees that this split will be beneficial to almost everybody, and especially to us in the new country of California. In fact, God is so excited about it, she's going to shift the whole country at 4:30 pm EST this Friday. Therefore, please let everyone know they need to be back in their states by then. God is going to give us the Pacific Ocean and Hollywood. In addition, we're getting San Diego. (Sorry, that's just how it goes.) But God is letting you have the KKK and country music (except the Dixie Chicks).

Just so we're clear, the country of California will be pro-choice, pro-gay marriage, and anti-war. Speaking of war, we're going to need all Blue States citizens back from Iraq. If you need people to fight in Falujah, just ask your evangelical voters. They have tons of kids they're willing to send to their deaths for absolutely no purpose. And they don't care if you don't show pictures of their kids' caskets coming home.

So, you get Texas and all the former slave states, and we get the Governator and stem cell research. (We would love you to take Britney Spears off our hands, though. She IS from the south, right?)

Since we get New York, you'll have to come up with your own late night TV shows because we get MTV, Letterman, the Daily Show, and Conan O'Brien. You get... well, why don't you ask your people at Fox News to come up with something entertaining? (Maybe you should just watch Crossfire. That's a really funny show.)

We wish you all the best in the next four years and we hope, really hope, you find those missing weapons of mass destruction. Seriously. Soon.

Sincerely, California

Via Alicia

f$#* the south

Another post-election rant.

Warning: This rant contains beaucoup beaucoup beaucoup de profanity.
Via Hilary

public enemy number one million two hundred and twenty six

Tim Allen, comedian, had this to say about Martha Stewart:

Boy, I feel safer now that she's behind bars. O.J & Kobe are walking around, Scott Peterson's going to be soon, but they take the one woman in America willing to cook and clean and work in the yard and haul her ass to jail.

Via Nancy

valkyrie, schmalkyrie

Via Tatjiana (click image for a larger version)


Me, at Kendall and William's Hat and Tie party a few weeks back.

Now imagine 500 Norwegian soccer fans wearing this hat and screaming for Swedish or Danish blood, because that's where it usually gets worn by the owner of the hat. (Not me.)

she called it my SNL photo

Photo © 2003 Alicia Holdner-Campen (click image for a larger version)