splicing

I posted my profile on an online dating site and it's a bit over-the-top, even for me.
Giant disclaimer: A male friend of mine who's done online dating heavily influenced much of what's posted there. As he's precisely the type of person I'd like to date, I thought it made sense to listen to him. After all, the first rule in writing is to know your audience.

Anyhow, here's one of the responses:

Subject: Oh sure...
It always starts with comma splicing. Just this once. You're in a hurry, got things to do, who's going to notice this one time? Trust me, it's a short step from there to splitting infinitives (hell, it's just another kind of splice, really, right?), and before you know it, you're sticking prepositions at the end of sentences like the Administration stacking up new excuses for the war. It can only lead to the shame of dangling participles and introducing yourself at some 12-step meeting.

Although he's not my demographic, it's good to know that there are some seriously funny people out there.