mardi, octobre 11, 2005

take a hint

I month ago, I made an amateur mistake. I gave a guy my phone number at a coffeehouse. My real number.

Before you all start lecturing me on my folly, here's why I did it:

  1. Inexperience: I didn't know that I could say "no" to giving the guy my number.
  2. Extreme fatigue/ being caught off-guard: I was so brain-dead after an eight-hour workday, four hours of class, and two additional hours of OB reading that I didn't think to get his number instead of giving him mine.
  3. Ego: I'll admit it. I was flattered that he found me attractive after my marathon day and my scratch-my head, chew-my-pen, hunch-over-my-paper mannerisms, oblivious to the fact that I had an admirer while studying.
  4. An aversion to being seen as a bitch: I also didn't want to give him a fake number, because I study there often and would have to see him and deal with that discomfort for who-knows-how-long.
  5. An oddly overdeveloped sense of empathy: I put myself in his shoes, and figured that it took courage for him to stop me. Besides, he seemed sincere enough.
  6. Naïvetée: He didn't seem like a stalker during that initial exchange.
In spite of the fact that I wasn't remotely attracted to him, I decided to be an adult about it (and at the very worst, chalk it up as practice in the dating world) and had coffee with him a week later.

I was very frank during the conversation and made it really clear that he wasn't my type, and that I really wasn't interested. By the end of the 60 minutes, he kissed my hand and said "so I'm really not your demographic?" and I pulled it away quickly and reiterated that he was, in fact, not my demographic.

He's been calling me a few times a week for the last four weeks. Tonight alone, he's called three times. Thank god for caller ID — I've never picked up the phone and am wondering when he'll get the hint. I'm at the point where I don't want to go to a coffeehouse alone, because I think I'll run into him.

Luis E., please stop calling me. You're really not my demographic.

And you're hereby banished from Claire de Lune and any other decent coffeehouses in this county.

3 commentaires:

personal ads a dit…

It is unfortunate that there are people out there that even when we try to be nice about things, they just still don't get the clues that we just aren't interested. And they go on to ruin it for the rest of the people... *sigh*

Christine a dit…

Sorry to hear he ruined the Claire de Lune for you. Hope you can get clear of the loon (dorky punny play on the coffee house name) :P. I could see how a guy could get stuck on you. However, this sounds seriously obsessive. This reminds me of a sitcom scene where a guy tries to get his obsessive girlfriend to dump him. He starts clipping his toenails in bed and instead of dumping him, she says how excited she is that he is willing to share such private moments and starts clipping her toenails in his bed.

Another tactic could be to continue to frequent the coffeehouse, but to wear gag boogers on your face. Or hey, maybe just pick your nose if he sits down at your table.

You shouldn't have to work this hard to get him to stop calling you. Good luck!

D a dit…

Eeep! That's not good. Perhaps you can block his phone number, but then he can try to call you from a pay phone.